Tuesday 2 October 2012

What are women told about sex?

Women like sex too.

Shocking, right? Well maybe not since I am sure many of you are either women who do in fact like sex, or men who have had sex with women who - hopefully- enjoyed the experience as well. But ladies, think back to when you were 13. What were you told about sex?

- Guys like sex. This is okay. 
- Girls are supposed to say no when a guy asks for sex. Saying yes is usually not okay.
- Girls can say yes but only if they are in love and they've been dating the guy for like six months and they want to be with him forever and blah blah blah. 
- If girls say yes too often, they are now a slut.

This is total crap of course, but this is the message kids receive. It's on TV, it's at school, it's pretty much everywhere. Now maybe you could say people tell girls not to have sex so they don't end up with an STI/pregnant/with their heart broken. Well first of all, why aren't boys being warned of the potential dangers of sex? And second, think of when you were young and you first started to masterbate. Yes, girls masterbate. Anyone who says she hasn't is lying. That's just the thing. Girls feel a sense of shame about masterbation. I remember feeling icky and dirty, like I was doing something wrong. 

So it's not just about having sex. It's female sexuality in general that is seen as a negative. Maybe not by everyone, and maybe not forever. But I am willing to bet that every woman, at at least one point in her life, has felt guilty about having/liking sex- myself included. It was until recently that I began to wonder why and to really want to change that. 

I always feel better when I know someone else feels the same way I do. Maybe someone reading this blog will feel better to know I am going through the same thing they are. 






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